Tuesday, November 06, 2007

Farnsy's Fake Machismo

When we went away for the weekend, Flea went to my friend Kristina's (because Flea loves her - she loves Flea. It's all a big lovefest over there). And Arthur (oh, god you people - 'Arthur' because it is the long form of 'Arty' which sounds like 'R.T' which stands for 'Reginald T. Farnsworth' - do I have to explain everything?) went to Montreal Dogs. He's been there many times and I like it when he gets an extra dose of dog socialization, since he's such a shit and all.

Farnsy has a thing called "leash aggression". LOTS of dogs have it. Off leash, they are fine. But when tethered, they get all riled up. When we're on a walk and he sees another dog he loses his MIND. He wants to rip their faces off. Which is pretty impossible considering most faces are a minimum of one foot above him. Anyway, when we dropped him off @ boarding we were hanging out on the lobby chatting with Mina (the owner) and Reggie was sniffing around the place. Being nice to other dogs, etc.

Then a muzzled, LEASHED sheepdog walked in. And - CHAOS. Chachi ran for her barking his fool head off. She lunged back at him. I ran over, grabbed his leash and said 'No!'. Which didn't even register on his level of insanity. He kept freaking out. At which point Mina said - "Nat, don't say anything - just walk away."

And I did. I dropped the leash and left Reggie to his devices. Fine - you wanna get tenderized, be my guest.

And what did the little bastard do? He ran after me! Once he realized he didn't have an audience, he got scared and ran right behind my legs like a pee baby. What a freakin' turd. (which he DID leave on the rug shortly after).

Of course, this would be unsafe to do with strange dogs on the street. But if I could practice this in a controlled environment with gentle dogs - I bet we could learn Farnsy out of this behaviour.

In the meantime - it's not like I'm trying to reign in a pitbull out there. But that was a lightbulb moment for sure.

And then I pooed on the rug, too. So what?! I was nervous.


Ma Horton said...

Leave Reggie with GrannyHo for a week and Karma and I will fix his little red leash aggression .

Maria said...

does Mina also train little kids?

Give her my contact info.

Newsguy Bob said...

Maria: I thought The Girl Formerly Known As Klepto had given up her life of crime.

Maria said...

Life of crime YES.
Wicked ways - NO.

For everything else there's MASTERCARD!

Misster Kitty said...


Maria... that was HI-lar-i-ous!

John said...

Hee hee

Thanks for the laughs you buncha crazies!

Maria said...

who you calling "buncha crazies"

I am gonna have to blog about what my little princess told me the other day. Remember, how I gave her that BIG shpeel about not stealing and I threw in no lying and such in the same conversation... well now she is driving me insane with her truthfulness.


Newsguy Bob said...

I bet you now know what your Mom put up with, eh, Maria? It always comes back to haunt you.

Are you sure that Princess wasn't switched at the hospital for, I don't know, maybe Rosemary's baby?

At least she doesn't each her own poo, like N@'s "kids" do. At least, I think it's safe to assume that she doesn't.

Maria said...

I was the best kid EVER!! Until I married a non-greek and mom almost pulled a hairy... (insert MY BIG FAT GREEK WEDDING here).

I sure as hell hope to God she does not eat her own poop. N@ has her hands full. After she trains little dogs, maybe she can eventually learn to train to little girls.

I even have one in mind. Anyone interested?

Newsguy Bob said...

Not me. If you were to go to achannel.ca/ottawa, click on Special Assignment and watch the series Stranger Danger, you wouldn't let me within a mile of Princess. But I'm not a pedophile, I just play one on TV. Honestly. I've been a Big Brother, for gosh sake, and just passed a criminal record check last week, for the volunteer work I'm doing at the local psych hospital.

Maria said...

so Bobby you would be the PERFECT candidate!

Newsguy Bob said...

Why? Because I volunteer at a psych hospital?