Saturday, December 30, 2006

Nell Carter sucked up the fishies.

She did!..remember? With the vaccuum hose in the opening credits of Gimme A Break. I always felt bad about that.

Back in Montreal - as I'm sure you've gathered. It's Saturday night! Pushin' 11 and I'm here pushin' e-papers. Writing the next installment of the Canadian Top 20. It's all good though, I'm making some substantial headway. Actually - I tried to write all day today and didn't quite get the gears to turn until about 5pm. That's when I felt I was really dipping my foot into meaty brain matter. The GOOD brain juices. Not the diluted stuff that can't solve one puzzle in Easy Bathroom Quizzlers. Weird how sometimes you just have to keep mindlessly striking keys til you start feeling that you're no longer a monkey at a typewriter. I guess my week off scabbed over my brain. Pickety. Pick. Pick. Roll. Inspect. Chew.

The show's deadline is Tuesday morning. But tomorrow is New Year's Eve. And the next day is, Recovery - or Monday, as the kids call it. So, I'm thinkin' I should try to get as much done ahead of time as I can or the show will end up with sen$%tences tH@t looook ann aWFl lot LIK^*# this274.

Went for dinner with Corn and Kim tonight. I mentioned, as I often do, to the waitress that I am allergic to eggs, so if she could check w/ the chef..bllah, blah...she later mentioned to me that she runs an accupressure business and gave me her card. She apparently uses accupressure to treat various things such as: anxiety, digestive problems, shoulder/neck pain, headaches and - allergies! Now, while I don't put much stock in accupressure curing a food allergy (she said mostly environmental) - I AM interested in the idea of accupressure. The waitress told me I had bad chi. BAD CHI! Because I was sitting all slouchy. I could have sworn it was bad GAS making me slouch...but I guess it was chi. She's actually right. I DO have a bad chi. His name is Chachi and he eats poop sandwiches. But I never woulda connected the dots that his filthy habit was costing me spinal health. I digress....accupressure. Timely topic cuz when I was home I was reading thru Ma's back issues of Women's Health (outstanding magazine by the way, which I am subscribing to ASAP) - and there was an article about accupressure. Y'know, squeezin' yer parts to make other parts do stuff. In fact, I think that's the motto of the National Accupressure Society: We Squeeze Yer Parts to Make Yer Other Parts Do Stuff.

Anyhoo, I've gone on enough. I must now return to unearthing fascinating tidbits about Nickelback and Christina Aguilera.
Perhaps I will fabricate a rumour that Chad Kroeger has bad chi or maybe that HE eats poop sandwiches! And if I don't post tomorrow:

HAPPY NEW YEAR, ALL!! Thanks for another fun year of letting me squeeze your parts!

P.S. Maria...kept forgetting to tell you...Radiothon hasn't happened yet. Will be goin on in the spring. And THANK YOU for asking!


Newsguy Bob said...

Welcome back, Nattypants.
All the best in 2K7.


P.S. Heh-heh. You said "parts".

N@ Lauzon said...

In addition to "parts", here are other salacious words used in the original post:

sucked, meaty, headway, chew, juices, filthy and monkey.


Maria said...

Nat, thanks about finally getting back to me about the Radiothon thing. I was laying in bed today thinking "did she ever answer THAT question?" lol

Anonymous said...

Too funny, I fogot all about that fish sucking thing. I used to love that show. Other than Nell Cater, whatever happened to the rest of the cast??